Grief Walking

Grief Walking

Dad at 41

Fazul Nawa Ahrary (1930 to 2015)

Dear Agha,

You left me 40 days ago

I haven’t mourned yet

What is that anyway?

You loved to walk and that’s what I’m doing

Walking in the simmering sun, oblivious to the heat

Walking during the black night, oblivious to the moon

Walking against the wind, trying to breathe

Feeling that dream

That dream in which you scream

But only silence ensues

You walked in search of familiarity,

I walk wishing for the unfamiliar

In search of strangers I can forget

Street names that fade

Memories I can erase

Instead, I see a pomegranate tree

The neighbor’s boy flashing his toddler teeth

The park where your grandchildren play

I see you with your arms folded across your back

Your feet parted like a duck

You let out that famous laugh

And you disappear

But I remain walking






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